Why I might need an aging potion, and why I also should not need one
I'm angry, and I know I'm righteously angry, even though I don't think anyone believes or agrees with me. Today I was encouraged to dress more 'business-like' than the other teachers on the faculty, as a means to help distinguish myself better from my students because I am so young. Sure, I see the good intentions of the point. And it is a little weird and difficult to imagine myself tripping up and down the steep stairs in a blazer and heels. But more than that I feel a righteous indignation. Here's why:
The school I now teach in is virtually devoid of anyone between the ages of eighteen and thirty-eight. I form a single, sole member of a Lower School faculty that is otherwise comprised of married mothers (minus two fathers) with children ranging in age from 4 years to college.
At 24, unmarried and childless, I do not fit into that picture. And everyone is equally, if not more unsure than me, about what to do about it.
I think they all believe the answer is to try to teach me and mold me into the 40-year-old-adult I am not, and until then, assume I am incompetent and bring nothing to the table.
The 'business attire' thing pisses me off, frankly, because it's discrimination to expect me to dress differently based on my age, but more than that, this proposal hints at the larger underlying problem that my age is indeed just that--a problem.
No one seems to notice--or even take an interest in--how I teach and instruct; my entire self-worth, value, and quality in the eyes of the school community is tied to my age. What an ironic thing that a christian school that recognizes its pieces as being broken human beings nevertheless holds up as a crime a piece of someone's God-designed identity as a--and the primary--fault to be fixed?
There are a lot of things, to be sure, I should be apologizing and trying to make up for, but I will not apologize for being or looking or sounding young. I could sooner turn into a turnip than become a graying adult.
I spend so much time worrying about presenting myself in a godly, positive, kind, responsible, respectful, nearly goody-two-shoes-type person at school, but no one cares, because in their eyes I will continue to be at fault for the way (really, when) God made me.
And since when did that ever matter beyond the learning and development of the school's students anyway? No one pays any mind or attention to what, when, or how I teach, but they are totally preoccupied with trying to fix a problem, that, quite honestly, is to be little improved by putting on high heels and a blazer. You can take the girl out of the sweaters and plaid shirts, but no matter what her clothing, she's going to remain 24. All that will have changed is that she may now instead look like a 24-year-old pretending to be older, and just looking stupider and more childish for it.
But the real question is, why is 24 considered a deficit anyway? Isn't the very principle of why we try to reach and educate all children tied to the fact that they are children made in God's image, each bearing a uniquely god-like image that should be seen, valued, and shared with others?
Yes, I'm different. I'm trying my best to fit in--but at the end of the day, God created me to be 24 right now, and I can't be anything else. Is there nothing positive a 24-year-old teacher could contribute? I want to be part of the community, but part of Christian community is an inherent diversity. Why must, like the treatment of my age group in the Church, young adult singlehood be seen as a socially-unacceptable status?
The school I now teach in is virtually devoid of anyone between the ages of eighteen and thirty-eight. I form a single, sole member of a Lower School faculty that is otherwise comprised of married mothers (minus two fathers) with children ranging in age from 4 years to college.
At 24, unmarried and childless, I do not fit into that picture. And everyone is equally, if not more unsure than me, about what to do about it.
I think they all believe the answer is to try to teach me and mold me into the 40-year-old-adult I am not, and until then, assume I am incompetent and bring nothing to the table.
The 'business attire' thing pisses me off, frankly, because it's discrimination to expect me to dress differently based on my age, but more than that, this proposal hints at the larger underlying problem that my age is indeed just that--a problem.
No one seems to notice--or even take an interest in--how I teach and instruct; my entire self-worth, value, and quality in the eyes of the school community is tied to my age. What an ironic thing that a christian school that recognizes its pieces as being broken human beings nevertheless holds up as a crime a piece of someone's God-designed identity as a--and the primary--fault to be fixed?
There are a lot of things, to be sure, I should be apologizing and trying to make up for, but I will not apologize for being or looking or sounding young. I could sooner turn into a turnip than become a graying adult.
I spend so much time worrying about presenting myself in a godly, positive, kind, responsible, respectful, nearly goody-two-shoes-type person at school, but no one cares, because in their eyes I will continue to be at fault for the way (really, when) God made me.
And since when did that ever matter beyond the learning and development of the school's students anyway? No one pays any mind or attention to what, when, or how I teach, but they are totally preoccupied with trying to fix a problem, that, quite honestly, is to be little improved by putting on high heels and a blazer. You can take the girl out of the sweaters and plaid shirts, but no matter what her clothing, she's going to remain 24. All that will have changed is that she may now instead look like a 24-year-old pretending to be older, and just looking stupider and more childish for it.
But the real question is, why is 24 considered a deficit anyway? Isn't the very principle of why we try to reach and educate all children tied to the fact that they are children made in God's image, each bearing a uniquely god-like image that should be seen, valued, and shared with others?
Yes, I'm different. I'm trying my best to fit in--but at the end of the day, God created me to be 24 right now, and I can't be anything else. Is there nothing positive a 24-year-old teacher could contribute? I want to be part of the community, but part of Christian community is an inherent diversity. Why must, like the treatment of my age group in the Church, young adult singlehood be seen as a socially-unacceptable status?
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